Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
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