All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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