ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
I wish i was in the wii world.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
