she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Randomize
