with your own penis?
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Randomize
