i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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