marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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