I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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