1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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