I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
