I'm laying in your front yard are you home
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
