just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
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