I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
Randomize
