I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize
