brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
Randomize
