i barfeds in our rink
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Boobs are out for the taking
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
