Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize