are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
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