reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Randomize