Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
