whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
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