the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
