i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
Randomize
