it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Randomize
