1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
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