He had one of those small greek statue penises
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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