yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Randomize
