Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
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