so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
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