i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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