I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
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