Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
Randomize