She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Randomize