Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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