You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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