think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
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