Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
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