I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
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