I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
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