My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
