actually, I'm a sock model
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Randomize