I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
