I must be too annoying 4 u.
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
I feel like people expect me to always be a sarcastic, shade throwing drunk. And you know me, I hate to disappoint.
Randomize
