'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
I queefed so loud it echoed.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
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