come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
How external is "for external use only"?
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize