Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
