Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize