I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
