somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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