i permit you to call me
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
Randomize
